Starting my PhD journey in my late 20s, I felt a mix of excitement and quiet self-doubt as I walked into orientation. Most of my peers seemed younger as they were fresh out of their undergraduate or master’s degrees. I remember attending my first graduate-level academic class, feeling slower in my learning compared to others, as it had been almost six years since I had last taken an academic course. The struggle of getting back into academia was quite a challenge. Although I never felt delayed in my own timeline, societal pressures and seeing how early others started their journeys sometimes made me wonder if I was falling behind. Through continuous self-reflection, I have always maintained that there is no "right" timeline for building a meaningful career or achieving life goals. This perspective has shaped how I approached the transition into a PhD—here are a few coping strategies that have helped me along the way:
- Letting go of societal timelines: It is easy to internalize societal timelines (ex: I need to graduate by X age, get a job by Y age, find a partner, own a home, etc.). Letting go of that narrative became one of the first, and most important, coping strategies that helped me navigate through this new chapter. By letting go of that timeline, I was able to take the pressure off myself and focus on my own growth and learning. The truth is, everyone’s timeline is different, and it’s possible to create a meaningful path for yourself, even when it doesn’t follow a traditional, linear route. Going through a PhD program is hard enough and comes with immense pressure, and the least you can do for yourself is to let go of internalized societal timelines while you create a unique path for yourself.
- Finding community through student clubs: During my first year, I intentionally got involved in various student run clubs and attended workshops and events on campus. Even though I felt out of place at first, it helped me connect with other students and learn more about their experiences during this program. Being involved in clubs and other organizations during grad school helped me meet like-minded individuals and allowed me to give back to the student community.
- Find yourself a mentor: Studies have shown that one of the key limitations of graduate education today is the lack of accessible and consistent mentorship1. Having a mentor can help you speak things through to someone who may have more experience than you in navigating certain obstacles, such as steps to developing a thesis idea, reaching out to professors for volunteering opportunities, resume/CV editing, and any other issues you may have navigating through school. Most programs at UofT offer formal mentorship opportunities, so it’s worth exploring what’s available in your department and taking advantage of that support early on.
- Adopting a growth mindset: In grad school, you will likely be wrong about something, make mistakes, or fall short of certain expectations. Don’t be too hard on yourself; it’s all part of the process. Instead of fearing failure, embrace it as a learning opportunity. In fact, research shows that students who are psychologically flexible—i.e., those who can adapt to challenges by staying present and open to experiences—are more likely to persevere in the face of setbacks2. Growth often comes from reflection, revision, and persistence. By focussing on the process, rather than the outcome, you will find yourself making steady progress.
- Redefine productivity: Some days you may feel highly productive, and others may leave you wondering if you did enough. Try to keep track of your wins, big or small. When the days feel slow, jot down what you accomplished, even if it was just reading an abstract or thinking through a complex idea. In grad school, progress comes by taking a series of small, steady steps over a period of time. Acknowledging that movement, however subtle, can go a long way in helping you stay motivated.
Navigating graduate school can come with its challenges. You might move forward one day and feel stuck the next. But with the right mindset and strategies, it can be one of the most enriching and rewarding experiences.
Citations:
- SenthilKumar G, Mathieu NM, Freed JK, Sigmund CD, Gutterman DD. Addressing the decline in graduate students' mental well-being. Am J Physiol Heart Circ Physiol. 2023 Oct 1;325(4):H882-H887. doi: 10.1152/ajpheart.00466.2023. Epub 2023 Aug 25. PMID: 37624099.
- Jeffords JR, Bayly BL, Bumpus MF, Hill LG. Investigating the Relationship between University Students' Psychological Flexibility and College Self-Efficacy. J Coll Stud Ret. 2020 Aug 1;22(2):351-372. doi: 10.1177/1521025117751071. Epub 2018 Jan 9. PMID: 33867862; PMCID: PMC8049598.